I'm Afraid Youve Got Dragons

 By: Peter S. Beagle

Location: FIC BEA

Genre; Dragons!

THE ART!!!!!!!!  OH MY-  ONE OF THE BEST I'VE EVER SEEN!

If you judge a book by the cover, this would have to be in everyone's top 10!

From the New York Times bestselling author of The Last Unicorn comes a new novel with equal amounts of power and whimsy in which a loveable cast of characters trapped within their roles of dragon hunter, princess, and more must come together to take their fates into their own hands.


Dragons are common in the backwater kingdom of Bellemontagne, coming in sizes from mouselike vermin all the way up to the fabled Kings, which haven't been seen in an age. Gaius Aurelius Constantine Heliogabalus Thrax (who would much rather people call him Robert) has recently inherited his deceased father's job as a dragon exterminator, a career he detests with all his heart. Things turn from bad to worse when Robert is hired by the royal family to disinfest the entire castle, as Princess Cerise is determined to receive Crown Prince Reginald with the shabby château looking its best.

What happens next is not the fairy tale you may be expecting.

"Peter S Beagle is, as ever, a master. Like the dragons and dreams therein - gorgeous and vibrant and wistfully fantastic - he never neglects the sharp teeth that confirm a tale as absolutely real."

– —Travis Baldree, New York Times bestselling author of Legends and Lattes

"A moving tale from a fantasy master."

– —Reactor Mag

“Bringing to mind both Neil Gaiman’s Stardust and Patricia C. Wrede’s Enchanted Forest Chronicles,...a reluctant dragon hunter escorts a prince on a dragon-slaying hunt through the kingdom of Bellemontagne as the prelude to a betrothal between kingdoms.”

– —LitHub

"Equal parts Monty Python and Dragonheart? The Smaug section of The Hobbit? Let’s just say Beagle’s I'm Afraid You've Got Dragons is its own creature entirely, much like every dragon I've ever met."

– —Parade

“Beagle’s cozy novel embraces over-the-top fantasy tropes, and the effect is a tale that’s as hilarious as it is endearing. Evocative of Terry Pratchett, the writing grows beyond its charming aesthetic to deliver a deceptively serious narrative.”

– —Library Journal

"Peter Beagle is an icon in the world of fantasy fiction … charming characters and cozy high fantasy vibes are worth the wait."

– —Paste Magazine

Review by kaitlin

I’m Afraid You’ve Got Dragons is a highly anticipated, high fantasy fairytale fraught with mighty dragons, evil wizards, reluctant heroes, craven princes, and a damsel that is in fact not so distressed, is sick of obstinate heroes, and can do the rescuing herself, thank-you-very-much!

Gaius Aurelius Constantine Heliogabalus Thrax (known as just “Robert”) is the resident dragon slayer---oops, I mean dragon exterminator---in the small kingdom of Bellemontagne. He despises his job, which he, alas, performs exceedingly well, but he is duty bound to take up this accursed mantle from his late father. It’s always been something he experiences immense inner turmoil over, ethically and emotionally. He really likes dragons and has several secret pet dragons of his own. Furthermore, dragon exterminators are held in the same regard as the draconic vermin they are tasked to exterminate, so obviously he wants to be more than that. Robert has ambitious aspirations to become a… prince’s valet.

Princess Cerise of Bellmontagne finds herself under sudden and extreme pressure to have the considerable dragon infestation at the castle removed, so Robert and his services are summoned. The sudden reason for the extermination would be to impress the visiting Crown Prince Reginald of Corvinia, a much richer and larger kingdom than Cerise’s own. With love at first sight, Cerise just knows they are destined to be together. But Prince Reginald has his own agenda to reckon with before he could ever consider a marriage…he must impress his father, King Krije, and prove his worthiness as a son. After much consideration and planning with Mortmain, his valet, they decide to make a proposal contingent upon slaying a great magical beast to prove his valor and value to the Prince’s father. Of course, it is decided that they would go dragon hunting, so they beseech the only one among them with any dragon slaying experience to go along too---poor Robert! As things quickly start to snowball out of control for the prince and his valet, an evil wizard previously thought to be dead and gone will descend upon the party of dragon hunters, but an unsuspecting hero will rise to the occasion to hopefully save them all. This cleverly written satirical fantasy has a prince, a princess, and a humble dragon exterminator all questing to escape from their predetermined roles in their fairytale lives ostensibly by slaying a dragon and besting an evil wizard but actually by discovering their true hearts’ desires and mastering their newfound selves.

Heartwarming and nostalgically magical, this tale will go down as one of my very favorites. I really loved the satirical tone of the story, and it reminded me of how the Princess Bride was told. Similarly, the author uses exaggerated fantasy tropes to create a whimsical tale that is laugh out loud funny. I found it downright comical how dragons are considered in this book! They are treated with the same amount of disdain and repugnance we reserve for insects, and there is such a relatable moment in the story where Princess Cerise, a shoe, and a dragon have it out. I also found myself giggling at Dahr, the great and evil wizard. As far as storybook villains go, he was up there with the best of them, posturing and pressing his long-winded machinations on everyone, wasting too much time and missing opportunities to bring his grandiose evil plans to fruition. Lastly, I feel obligated to call attention to the beautifully illustrated cover since it immediately caught my eye. It is a detailed watercolor painting that depicts a castle on a grassy hill with a thunderous horde of dragons circling overhead and a behemoth of a dragon resting in the foreground.


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